How did you end up this way?
You came into your current relationship/marriage with high hopes and dreams. You felt deep connection and commitment to your partner, and they expressed the same to you, and then WHAM!
They changed up on you!
And now you’re living a nightmare that just won’t end.
You have been betrayed, lied to, abandoned, dropped and/or replaced. They are not the person you thought you had married or committed your heart to.
And you’re stuck. You don’t have the power or courage to leave, and you don’t have the power to stay. You’re in a vicious loop of indecision.
You are PISSED OFF and confused. Yet, there you are, still in that toxic situation that is causing everyone involved nothing but pain, more anger and grief.
You might even hate yourself for STILL loving the person who hurt you so deeply.
Here are the reasons you believe you can’t leave:
- It would hurt your children, and you can’t leave until they are in college
- You have too much invested, financially and emotionally to leave now – even though staying is killing you
- My spouse/partner will DIE without me – they need me.
- I can’t support myself without my spouse/partner – they hold all the money.
Yet, I can’t forgive them and stay because:
- I don’t want to give them a pass and condone being treated like a doormat.
- It’s not safe to forgive them; I have to keep my guard up in order to protect myself
- They might see how much I still love them – and I can’t risk that kind of vulnerability to a person who hurt me so deeply
- If I forgive them, who will be accountable for what happened to me?
- They have NEVER taken responsibility for their actions and apologized